My Issues with Electronic Entertainment

"Mom, can we play the Playstation?" Like most moms, I only hear this question a dozen times a day. Every once in a while I smile and say, "Sure." Thinking, "He's done his chores and homework and only hit his brother a couple of times, why not reward the kid?" But most of the time I curse Santa and wish the North Pole had a better return policy. Santa is the one who got us into the video game mess. Two years ago the boys wrote letters and e-mails and even prayed for a Playstation as they were the "only kids in the whole world without one." So we had a very fun Christmas morning, all faith in Santa was instantly restored (they knew their mom would never buy a Playstation), and I have been wishing we could redo that Christmas morning every day since.

My boys often ask what I have against video games. The boys are good to not play violent games and they only fight over the two controllers and claim they could beat the level better than their brother every five minutes or so. Basically video game time at our house is a pretty peaceful stretch of thirty minutes where Mom can run around and catch up on chores or Facebook uninterrupted.

My issues with video games (or computer games, television, texting, etc.) only comes into play when an excessive amount of time is spent on said activities. I'm afraid if I don't limit electronic time my boys won't learn to work hard and improve themselves during their time here on earth. "Men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause." (i) This includes children. The best time to teach correct principles is when they are little. I want my children to learn so many things: how to interact well with others, a great knowledge of the scriptures, faith, how to be hard workers, how to serve others, how to love to read and do well in school. My list, like yours I'm sure, could go on and on. But how am I going to teach them all these things if they are so busy with school, athletics, Scouts, friends, and electronic entertainment? You'll probably agree that most of the things on my sons' lists are good activities. About the only one I want to cut back on is the electronics. Now I'm not saying the boys will never play another video game (if I tried that they'd run away to Granny's). But I might say no to the Playstation a little more often and actually stick to the thirty minute time limit.

The church I belong to (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints) has asked our local leaders to have fewer meetings and place less demands on families. Our general authorities have asked us to slow down and eliminate excessive extracurricular activities so we can spend more time together at home. (ii) These are wonderful ideas if the family takes advantage of that extra time to teach, love, and play with their children. But if my boys use that extra time to conquer more levels on Star Wars Battlefront and I use that extra time to surf the blogosphere, we would be better to be off playing more basketball games or doing more Scouting activities. I believe our leaders are encouraging that extra time at home so we can build better family relationships and prepare our children to succeed in an increasingly evil world. These things won't happen if we are all plugged in.

So what's my solution? I have to be a more involved parent. It's easy to be a lazy Mom. Children can be endlessly entertained, they can make their own food in the microwave, and they can put themselves to sleep watching television (we've only done that a few times, promise). I have to work harder. It's hard to say no to Playstation, get myself away from my computer, and go outside to play a game of Lightning with the boys, read the latest 39 Clues book to them, see if I can finally beat them at Monopoly, or go pick up some of their friends for a fun late night. I'm so busy right now I've given up on folding laundry (it works if you just throw it all in a basket for each child and they somehow find what they want to wear), but laundry, housework, and even writing can wait. Teaching and enjoying my boys has to be the first priority. Maybe if I do a good enough job I'll only hear, "Can I play the Playstation?" five times today.


(i) Doctrine and Covenants 58:27
(ii) "Good, Better, Best," by Elder Dallin H. Oaks, October, 2007

Weighing the Cost

As I am not a supporter of television, you can imagine my frustration when I opened our Dish Network bill yesterday. $91.99 for one month. My husband was so upset he almost cancelled. I was hoping and praying, but alas he talked to the representative. They apologized and adjusted the bill to $51.99 per month. Still more than it should be.

How much is too much for television? With the stress of a poor economy I would think television carriers would be competing for customers, but I've been assured that for most people television is worth the cost. What about you? How much would you be willing to pay or are you like me and wish you could cut it completely from the budget?

Giveaway - The Sister Pact

The contest for a free copy of The Sister Pact ends tomorrow. Don't forget to enter - http://camicheckettsbooks.blogspot.com/2009/07/sister-pact-win-free-copy.html.

Good luck!

The Sister Pact - win a free copy

The Sister Pact will be in bookstores August 1st. Yeah! I'm doing a giveaway on my blog - http://camicheckettsbooks.blogspot.com and on Goodreads. Here's a little info about the book. (Hope you can read this, I inserted as large a picture as I could!) For more info go to my website - www.camichecketts.com or you can read the entire first chapter here - http://cedarfort.com/media/ebook/9781599552675Sample.pdf.

Thanks, friends!

Squandering Time

"Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time; for that's the stuff life is made of." by Benjamin Franklin

This was the title of a recent workshop I attended at BYU Women's Conference. I was excited to hear the speakers, certain they would tell me to get my stuff together, to be more effective. Instead they advised us all to slow down, to decide what is most important and focus on that.

I, along with most parents, will tell you my children are the most important people in my world, but do I spend the time nurturing and enjoying that relationship as much as I could? 

I don't watch television so that isn't a drain on my time, but I am guilty of spending hours in front of a computer screen - writing novels, articles, and blogs, twittering, Facebooking, e-mailing. How do I keep this all in perspective so I can accomplish my writing goals yet still put my family first? 

The only idea I've come up with are set writing times. Starting this week I will be in my office from 1:30 - 3:30 p.m. As soon as my time is up the computer is shut down and the office door locked. If I'm in the middle of a sentence, I'll just have to hope my failing memory can recall how I was going to describe Alex's eyes. 

I pray these set hours will work well for me and my family. 

How do you keep work, family, and leisure activities balanced? 

The kids are back at home

The boys are out of school, and as Matthew Buckley says, "It isn't a good summer day if you haven't said, 'I'm bored' at least twenty times before noon." It's been raining in Northern Utah since school got out. After hearing "I'm bored" thirty times I am sorely tempted to let them watch that television show they've been begging for. But lucky for me we have a rewards system. Here's how it works:

The boys have a daily chore and activity list. If they check off each area - family chores, personal chores, reading, academic (math, science, or Spanish), physical fitness, and smile (I love to threaten that they won't get their smiley face check whenever they get a bit feisty) - they are allowed thirty minutes of Play Station, computer games, or television. Also, if they get all their check marks for the week they get to draw out of the prize box on Saturday. 

So far, it's been working beautifully. The boys have kept busy and my house has never been so clean (can't beat free labor). 

Here's a list of other ideas I use to keep my children happy and busy.

- Sports - our favorites are playing catch with a football, wrestling on the carpet, kicking a soccer ball around and practicing baseball or basketball
- Playing hide and seek
- Playing board games or card games - my boys' favorites are Go Fish, Sorry and Risk (notice I said the boys' favorites, not mine!)
- Reading stories together - we love chapter books. Lately we've devoured the Peter and The Starcatchers series by Dave Barry and Ridley Pierson, Chickens in the Headlights by Matthew Buckley, and Serpentide by K.L. Fogg.
- Going on a bike ride or walk even better if you can ride to the park and play or ride to the river and throw rocks
- Cleaning - my friend, Nikki, hands her boys a dust rag every time they say, "I'm bored." We've taken it a step farther. We draw out of a jar the name of a room in our house. Then the boys and I clean that room from top to bottom - blinds, baseboards, drawers, everything. You'd think this would be miserable but it actually turns out pretty great. The boys work hard because I'm working alongside them and we get some wonderful chatting time in.
- Visiting our elderly friends
- Going to the library or book store (two of my favorite places on earth)
- Playing Playdough or doing craft projects - I am horrible at craft projects, but Parenting magazine will often have fun and easy ideas that I can handle.
- Making magic potions or baking together

- Mummify your chid - Give your child a roll of toilet paper. Have him run around you wrapping you like a mummy.
- Setting up an obstacle course in the basement or backyard
- Building forts out of blankets
- Jumping on the tramp
- Playing in the sand (especially if water is involved)
- Having battles with Playmobils or Imaginext knights and pirates
- Chasing for a kiss - the boys run around screaming, if I catch them I get to kiss them.
- Dancing to music
- Making a band with pots, pans, and cooking utensils
- Letting them earn a dollar and then taking them to the dollar store to spend it - again, their favorite, I'd prefer they save their money.  
- Playing silly games like airplane on Mom's feet or horse rides on Mom's knees or holding their leg and hand and spinning until we lose our equilibrium. 

I'm sure all of you could come up with hundreds of better ideas. Please post them through the comments if you'd like. I'd love to hear them.

Hope you have a fabulous summer with your family - Cami

http://www.camichecketts.com

Pushing the Envelope

My brother saw a commercial during a Super Cross (dirt bike) event for condoms. My brother isn't a prude, but to hear him describe the commercial. Sheesh. A couple was basically having sex with certain spots blurred out. 

I don't know if any of you have sons, but mine are enamored with dirt bikes. They beg their dad to record these events off of television. What if they'd seen that commercial? 

I admit I'm overly sensitive to all the sex and violence in our media, but I think most parents want to protect their children from such exposure. 

What do you think? Are the commercials and shows too risque? Do you screen what your family views? Is there anything we can do besides unplugging cable to protect our families?